07-29-2008 12:45:38

Why must my father get married? He has already ruined my life enough as it is. Why should he be given happiness if he has denied my and my family's? He shouldn't! Why does he have to pick her? Why not my mother? She was there from him. For us. And he wasn't. One of the two things he is good at; leaving and breaking promises. Oh. Three things: Leaving, breaking promises, and making things worse. And yet I was never good enough for him! Sure, I may not be his model daughter. But, he could never be proud of who I am. I am just a constant disappointment. No matter my accomplishments, I was never what he wanted. He wanted someone else. A different daughter. Maybe I am the reason why he left. Maybe I am the reason why he left my mother and brothers. Maybe it is because of me that we now have to suffer, and that my mother is ill, and my older brother joined the army. Maybe it is because of me that I am crying right now, thinking of was and what could have been. Maybe.

Love from,

Amanda

06-17-2008 11:15:43

Ok, dude. Life has officially decided to make me suffer.... My dad is getting remarried! So, now I will have not only a StepMonster. but a step-brother and sister.... Isn't that great!?! And, worst of all, my dad is moving to Ohio!!!!!! Life just keeps getting worse and worse!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love from,

Amanda

Ok. Seriously. What is everyone's deal with music? Why is it that we are branded for the rest of our existence, soley based upon which genre of music we listen to? I mean, so what if I listen to rock, or metal. Does that mean that I can't listen to a different type of music or be friends with someone who likes a different type of music? Well, everyone needs to get a grip on life and take reality for a ride.

Love from,

Amanda

Wow. I am in total shock. But, to explain how I am in shock, you need to understand why I am in shock. It all started last year when we began the poetry unit in school. I thought that I was a horrible writer and poet (granted, I still do), but, anyways, it came as a surprise to me when everyone said that I was a natural at writing, especially poetry. Then, my teacher suggested to all of us students that we enter into a poetry contest. I entered, and was published. Then, I learned from a friend of mine about another poetry contest. I entered into it this year, and am now a semi-finalist in the contest. Today, in about five and a half hours, the winner will be chosen. If chosen, I could go on to win 10,000 dollars! I can't believe it. The thing that makes it twisted, though, is the fact that my poems are about death, detruction, and the darkness. There is nothing wholesome about them. Man, the people will never pick me.

Love from,

Amanda